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3rd April 2009: So tonight has been really dull too.  I think I may have just had my moment of the night.  A 5 minute chat with a taxi driver about the state of the economy and how tax rebates rather than bank bailouts would have restarted the economy.  Because honestly, that is the biggest thing that has happened all night.  No customers, no staff issues (we're not talking, so issues are irrelevant) and just generally nothing much of anything going on. I did have one, just one, decent customer tonight.  By decent I mean blogworthy.  He came in and really, refused to not be noticed.  Green suede jacket, red jumper, a cream scarf and blue jeans.  That's a lot of colours for one person.  Me, I like to stick to one colour, mostly black.  Sometimes grey with it if I am feeling a bit of a devil.  But he then came to the till and said "Good evening my dear fellow!  I am situated at petrolium dispensing device number four" really loudly.  I mean, come on, seriously.  Who does that?  Then when he paid he said "Good day to you sir!  May your forthcoming activities all be immensely pleasurable ones", bowed, and then left.  Now I like eloquent speech.  Big fan of it.  Big fan of Russell Brand for speaking that way.  But come on, when you are paying for petrol at midnight, do you really need to speak like that?  Especially at volume.  And bowing.  Again, big fan of manners, and I STILL hold doors open for people, even at work.  But there are limits.  I don't bow to people who serve me.  I don't expect people I serve to bow at me.  Besides, if we're doing manners by the book, shouldn't I have bowed at him? I also had possibly the thickest customer I have ever met.  It was one of the John Pyatt workers, so no surprises there about lack of brainpower.  He came up with two packets of crisps and they're on an offer for £1.05 each or two for £1.20.  The conversation went like this: TSM:"That's £1.20" JPW:"Nah mate, they're £1.05 each on the shelf" TSM:"Yeah, they're on a special offer of two for £1.20" JPW:"F*cking rip off mate, I ain't got enough" TSM:"Ummm...sir, you've given me..." JPW:"Nah mate, don't give me that, I ain't got enough, put 'em back" TSM:"But..." JPW:"I ain't got enough, ok?  Stop trying to upsell me!  F*ck's sake!" TSM:"They are TWO for one pound twenty or ONE for one pound five" JPW:"Oh, f*ck that mate, you've lost me now.  It's too complex innit?" TSM:"*exasperated sigh* You have given me two pounds ten, they are one pound twenty.  Let me give you the 10p back and give you 80p change, then you get your crisps and money back" JPW:"Oh, whatever mate, too complex innit.  I don't get it.  F*ck's sake.  If you say it's right, guess it must be, you're some f*cking genius or something, right?" TSM bites tongue VERY hard and hands over his change. The funniest part is, this guy used to buy a £5 scratchcard every day called "Rich For Life".  I don't know what is scarier, his potential reaction when time after time he didn't win £40,000 a year for life, or what would happen if he actually did win £40,000 for life.  I'm also guessing that he does the scratchcards because he's been consistently turned down for lottery tickets because of invalid cards filled in... Lastly, and hugely off topic, well done to Honduras for beating the ass off Mexico.  3-1 is a spanking.  And it seems that the Mexican FA know this, because Sven Goran Erikson has been fired as their coach!  Ha.  Ha.  Ha.  It's OK Sven.  You may have lost Nancy, you may have lost your job, but it's fine.  You're in Mexico, and Faria is based in LA.  It's just a short plane trip to LA, and you never know, she might even do you for less than the £8000 she was charging a few months ago.  Permalink |