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6th April 2009: I am not having fun at all tonight.  Normally I find something to cling onto to make it a halfway decent night.  But not tonight.  You see, I've decided that I really can't stand my colleagues.  And I do have justification for this. I went into our canteen, where our rotas are hung up as well as staff notices to see who was the manager in the morning.  And then looked at my colleague of the month certificate.  I should explain here that I am proud of that certificate - and pride is not an emotion or concept I understand that well.  To me it seems to share a lot of traits with arrogance.  But I've been at the store for 5 years, and I think I do my job well, but I know I am disliked by a LOT of people.  So, I am proud that management made me colleague of the month.  Which is why I was disgusted, outraged and furious that when I saw it, someone had put "Creep" after my name.  I know who it was.  At least I have a good idea.  The Scotsman is really bitter that I got it.  Not that he does anything above and beyond his defined role to get colleague of the month.  So I go and tell Slaphead about it, and his response is an odd one.  Kind of muted, disinterested.  Same with The Bombshell.  Now, Slaphead was hanging around in the corner with The Scotsman yesterday morning near my certificate.  And The Bombshell spent the day with The Scotsman today.  So really, not that surprised that either of them are give a damn that it happened, because they either agree with it or conspired towards it.  And this is why I am not having a good night tonight.  You see, I've decided that if they want to be like that, fine.  I have had enough of the three of them.  All three feel entitled to mock my condition, which at least one will do on at least a weekly basis.  Prime example last night was The Scotsman - he yelled "Can't read, can't write, can't do f*ck all.  Excuse to be f*cking lazy if you ask me.  Nothing wrong at all with you, you lazy f*ck".  Nice.  The Bombshell frequently calls me stupid.  And Slaphead on any given shift I work with him will call me a f*cking idiot at least once.  So I am mounting a fightback.  A one man fightback.  If they want to be all friends and co-conspiritors together, that's fine.  But I am not being party to it.  Nor am I going to pretend for one second longer that I am neurotypical.  I do it to "fit in".  I'm not neurotypical, and I don't fit in, and I am really glad about it.  So, I am keeping my mouth shut, being civil to them, but not engaging them in conversation.  They no longer interest me.  End of rant. Permalink |