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14th
November 2008:
Tonight has been a real mixed bag. I mean, first I am working with Miss C, who isn't as bad as she used to be (pregnancy makes her way less b*tchy) but instead makes her a real little chatterbox. So I get a nice working environment, but I get little done because every time I want to try and do some work, she wants to chat. But we had a great opener to the shift. Two of dayshift came in and were buying things mostly, but also arsing about. Annoying but when one is Rickaaaay, not a lot you can do. Anyway, so they leave, and a few minutes later the police arrive and ask if two guys in a dark coloured hatchback have come in recently. The two employees arrived in, you guessed it, a black hatchback. So I told the policeman this, because, well, I am quite sadistic. And it will bury Rickaaaay in more poo than he is in already. The cop was reluctant to look at the CCTV footage, but eventually did, and fortunately for him he did. Turns out the guys he was looking for were our two fellow colleagues. So he pulled Queen Chav's address from her file and decided to pay Rickaaaay and Queen Chav a visit. Lovely. Payback is hell. But I did see something interesting. I noticed that people are still scared of the police. And interestingly, at least for me, was that it wasn't the people you would think who were scared that the police were at our place. It was kids. The same kids who mouth off to the police, they weren't scared that an officer was there, they were scared that an officer was there, and they couldn't see him. Very interesting for me, someone who has a deep love of psychology. Then I had one of the strangest experiences of my life. Ok, not of my life, but for quite some time. A girl came to the counter and discussed with her friend right in front of me how good looking I was. I felt like I had fallen into bizzaro world. I personally do not think I am a good looking person. My girlfriend will tell you this. Namely because I tell her this on a regular basis. Anyway, so I kind of shrugged it off and ignored it. I figured that this girl was kidding around. Turns out that she wasn't. She mooched around, and looked at our various poor offerings, and then came up to the till and said "I'm going, but I will definetly be back for you later!" and blew me a kiss. And incredibly, as fate would have it, I was severely unattracted to her. I mean, for a start she had my deal breaker of being blonde. And yet apparently my attraction holds no bounds. Because later on I think a guy was hitting on me too. In a stunning piece of salesmanship, I sold the Michelle McManus CD we have been trying to shift for 3 years. I mean, seriously, we cut it from £10.99 to £8.99, then down to £6.99, and then down to £5.99. Then earlier this year we cut it down to £3.99. Still no buyers. So this guy comes up to me, plops the CD down on the counter and says "Ahhhh...Michelle, whatever happened to her?" I grinned and said "We all fell out of love with her when she lost weight." He giggled and grinned back. So I rang the item up as £3.99, until the guy pointed to the sticker which said "Half marked price". Now I know that the yellow sticker price is the "half marked price" price. But, this was a chance for us to ditch the damned CD, so, I let the guy have it for £2. And then explained that we had been trying to get rid of it for 3 years. He asked if we had that a lot, and I said that in the bargain basket of CDs (which is actually three shelves) we probably had a few. He looked at the shelves, looked at me and said "Yeah, I'll be back for them, and for your service." And then smiled at me and said "See ya!" Now, I find flirting really really hard to pick up on, so, I have no idea if he was hitting on me, or being friendly. Lastly, Queen Chav and Rickaaaay had an almighty ding dong on the shop floor. I shall recount it for you here, because, well, it was spectacular and it was for all the public to see. And me to have a ringside seat as I was being served by Rickaaaay. QC: "So, are you going to get me a lift for 3 then Rick?" Rick: "I told you, I can't!" QC: "So you can get a lift for yourself at 11pm, but you can't get one for me at 3pm?" Rick: "Look, he was around at that time, he won't be around at 3!" QC: "Did you go and see that car?" Rick: "No" QC: "You told me you were going to see about it. So you lied." Rick: "Ugh! Stop 'aving a go at me!" QC: "Oh, sorry Rick, who was it who crashed my car and left me without a way to get into work? Oh yeah, that's right, it was you!" Rick: "Yeah, whatever, just 'ave a go at me!" QC: "Well, it's nice you want to be a part of this family so badly" Rick: (in mocking tones) "You want to be a part of this family meh meh meh" QC: "Well as you don't want to be part of this family, you can get your own insurance next year cos I ain't putting you on my insurance again!" Rick: "Oh f*ck off!" QC: "DO NOT SWEAR ON THE SHOP FLOOR!" Rick: "SORRY!" Shoe: "Rick, are you going to do any work today? Because all I can hear is you shouting at your mum from the office" Rick: "Oh for f*ck's sake! What is this? Have a go at Rick day?" QC: "I TOLD YOU NOT TO SWEAR ON THE SHOP FLOOR!" Me: "Can I have a bag please?" Rick: "No, you can't" Me: "Your customer service sucks" Rick: "Right! That's it! I am going for my first break, and no-one better f*cking interupt me!" Permalink | |
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