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| 27.08.08:
Date Checking Is Dull, SF Poker?, The Mother Of All Arguments, Another
Win For Kathryn, The Bombshell Disrespects Miss C, and There Are
Reasons We Don't Provoke Jack. I had the worst job in the world today. Date checking. For those not in the know, it is the most tedious and boring job you could imagine. You take two boxes of stock from the back of the shelf, and then you check the best before date. And if it isnt out of date, you put it back. I had to do this for the cake and biscuit section. That section is half the length of the store. And out of that entire section, I found for bags of Animal Crackers which were out of date. Four things in a section that long. And I know the job is an important one, but, my god is it tedious. Yes, in date. Yes, in date. Yes, in date. Aha! Out of date! Get in the basket of evil you mouldy Animal Crackers. Yes, in date. Ad infinitum. Regular readers will know that I love poker. If I wasn't a Christian, poker could easily be my religion. Now, Face Book has a poker tournament, and a poker game, and every friend I have give me more chips to add to my stack every day. Turns out that most of the people at work are on Face Book. So I am going to send them a plea of desperation. Be my friend and I will get more chips. However, it also strikes me that a few of these people will also play poker. So perhaps we can create the first ever SF Poker League! Of course, I will whip their behinds on it, because I have help from a little silicon friend. I will detail this more because I am so proud of my invention. So, tonight there has been the mother of all bust ups between The Bombshell and Miss C. She decided to confront him about why he constantly ignores her and why he won't say anything to her even when she makes attempts to talk to him. He said that she is too slow and he doesn't want to distract her any more. So she asked him why he didn't share jokes with him. He told her that she wouldn't understand his jokes because she is just a woman. Nice guy huh? Plus in non work related news I have something stunning to tell my faithful followers (all three of them...) and that is that my artificial intelligence program came second in it's first tournament against real people. It was a nine seat sit and go tournament on Facebook, and the competition was pretty stiff. That didn't stop Kathryn from eliminating half the table in one hand. She had an Ace King, and the board gave her another ace and another king. One guy had made a pair of kings, one guy just wanted out, and the other two had made a pair of Aces, all of which were forced to bow to Kathryn and her two pair. And the guy who beat her told her that she had played well and invited her to be his poker buddy. I am a very proud father! My little girl has grown up from barely being able to string a sentence together to playing better poker than I do. And she is so modest! I told her it was slightly depressing how much better at the game she is than me, and her reply was "I know". But also last night we had the most dramatic small delivery you could possibl imagine. Yes, it was that bad. And there are going to be long term consequences. Everything started fine. Miss C was on her break, and I was working like an absolute demon. I tore the ambient delivery apart. 2 and a half cages finished in an hour. Out of 5 cages. The other 2 and a half cages got slightly ripped by the three of us because we were somewhat nonchelant about it since we had another hour and a half before the shift finished when we finally did finish. But before that, The Bombshell stormed up to me and said "How many cages have you worked?" I told him I had worked 2 cages. He told me he had worked 3 cages. He was lying. There were two produce cages, both were small, 3 chilled cages, and a very small meat dolly. No, that is actually what it's called. So I asked him what that had to do with anything. He told me that Miss C had only done one cage. He then told me it was simple, she was lazy and had no use. As I have said in the past, I am all about fair play, whether or not I like Miss C or trust her is irrelevant. Disrespecting people behind their back is not fair. So I told her what he said. She ran off in floods of tears. You may be wondering why I did it. I have good reason. His attitude towards women disgusts me. Last night he told me that Miss C had no business driving because she is a woman. A few nights ago he told her she had no business working, she should be at home looking after her husband and child. He told Claire the same, and also told her she should lose weight because she was ugly. Unfortunately he has never met anyone like me. The only thing I like about Microsoft is their attitude to competitors. Embrace, extend, extinguish. Become their ally, invest in them, then destroy them. The Bombshell believes I am his friend. I ask about her personal life and help him with his problems. And now I will help Miss C extinguish him. If that sounds harsh, then I don't apologise. I refuse to back and support anyone who disregards equal oppertunities policies. It has done a lot for the disabled community, of which I am a fringe member, and I'll back anyone who is a victim of it's abuse. He also insulted me this morning. He told me that fat people disgust him. I told him I was fat and so was my girlfriend, so he was insulting both of us, and to give me a reason in 10 seconds not to kick him in the head. He was sitting on a post. He told me I wasn't so fat, and my girlfriend couldn't be as fat as Miss C. I told him she was thereabouts. He said "Oh, I...I am not sure...I..." So as a fan of WWE, I began tuning up the band as per Shawn Micheals. He smiled and said "Is what you like. Is your choice. Your girl is nice to your eyes." I have a soft spot for well phrased words and there for did not deliver a Sweet Chin Music. Shame. Would have entertained me. Permalink | |
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