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30.05.08: Miss C Is Lazy, Prodigal Number One Son, Arrogant Customers, and Shoe Is Two Faced.  Allegedly...

Streaming Song Of The Day: Beautiful Ones (live) by Suede

Free MP3 Of The Day: Moe Pope And Headnodic are Megaphone by Megaphone
Last night was just one 8 hour long horror show.  But then, I knew it would be.  I was working with Miss C.  On average, I do the work of two people.  This isn't bragging, we are given targets to hit, and these targets are around 35 cases an hour.  A case being one box of whatever.  My average is 70-90 cases an hour.  60 if I am having an off night.  Now, technically, Miss C also exceeds these targets, but she does it a really low way.  She will pick the cages which have what I call easy wins.  Easy wins are things like the sandwiches which only have four packets per case, and if you're smart you'll take two at a time out.  So, she can do a lot of these in a short amount of time.  Which makes it look like she's doing a lot of work, when in fact she does FA.  Another thing she will do is pick the cage with the least in it, so on CCTV she is working cage after cage.  And management buy it.  I will elaborate on this later.

The Chav's Number One Son came in at about 1am this morning.  He has been transferred to our Bournemouth store.  He was in a good mood, and we discussed the difference between his store and our store.  Turns out that we have nothing on his nightshift.  Their store was closed for 5 hours overnight, and his nightshift did nothing.  Didn't tidy the store, didn't work the backup stock, they didn't do anything.  Plus, when they get a delivery of what we call ambient stock (stuff that isn't chilled or frozen) they put it in the warehouse, then begin working it.  Madness.  Whatever management think of us, at least we're not as completely dumb as that lot.  Ironicly, the manager of that store is also Pedro.  And we actually did discuss Pedro.  Number One Son thinks that Pedro is the cause of all the problems in both stores.  Interesting theory...  Personally I think the cause of all the problems is The Chav.

Back to Miss C.  Now, knowing that 5am is our busiest time, she decided to waltz off and take her break just as the builders came in.  And then admitted she did it deliberately because she didn't want to serve them.  Thanks for that.  So during our busiest time, I was on my own.  And then the coffee machine ran out of milk.  The queue was back to the door, and the builders were complaining that we had no milk in the coffee machine.  On top of all this I had a headache.  However, the builders did prove how damned thick they are.  First builder told me that there was no milk in the machine, and I told him that I couldn't do anything.  He stropped off.  The second builder then said there was no milk in the coffee machine.  This happened five times in total.  Incredible that when it comes to Nuts or Zoo being low priced, or cheap DVDs being on sale they can communicate, but when it's something reasonably important, they clam up. 

And then I had the most arrogant customer I have ever served.  He said there was no milk in the coffee machine.  So I said "Yes, I know, but I can't do anything about it.  Sorry."  His reply?  "Yeah, whatever mate, I was just telling you to be helpful.  No need to bite my head off.  Christ, I know it's early but no need to take it out on me."  I kept my mouth shut.  I didn't mention that he looked like a blonde 70s Kevin Keegan.  I didn't mention that he was a moron.  I just kept my mouth shut and scanned his items.  Apparently this was also wrong.  He said "See?  You try to be helpful and you just get a lot of hassle.  Dunno why I bother."  I tried to explain that I'd had every builder complaining that we were out of milk so I knew.  He just went "I'm a builder, don't be having a go at them mate, I'm trying to be helpful.  Don't worry, if I was in a bad mood you'd know about it."  I hate customers like this.  The whole "I'm the customer, be afraid."  Trust me, we have a million ways to make the start of your day a bad one.  We can request a security check, they are never fun.  We can give you your change in tiny tiny pieces.  And rather than guessing the price, I can stroll to it and see what it costs.  Theatening the checkout person is never a good idea.  Unfortunately for this guy, we'd just finished some banking and were low on notes, so his £14.43 change was given to him in £1 coins, and 10ps, and 1ps.  He complained and I said that all transactions are final once the change has been given.  Well, it's true!

Lastly, but not at the end of the night, Miss C complained about Shoe.  She said that  Miss Chav who is her neighbour who also works at the store said that Shoe is one of the most two faced people in the store.  What Miss C completely misses is that Miss Chav (she isn't quite as chavtastic as THE Chav) is upset that not everyone is fawning all over her because she's pregnant.  I'm one such person.  My view is this, ok, she's pregnant, and yes there are some things that can be excused, like heavy lifting.  But lateness?  Attitude problems towards customers?  Attitude problems towards staff who don't make a huge fuss over her?  Her issue is that people are making a fuss over Blondie who is also pregnant and is Shoe's niece.  Maybe this is because Blondie can get in on time and eat breakfast before she arrives at work.  Miss Chav manages not only to be late, but also then goes to the canteen and sits down and eats breakfast before doing anything else.  And if anyone dares complain, she scowls and says "I'm pregnant innit?  Do you want me to work or let my baby starve?"  She picked the wrong person when she asked me.  I shrugged and said "Work would be nice, considering how you clocked in and all."  She slammed her cereal bowl down and stropped onto the checkouts and refused to speak to me for the rest of the hour we work together.  See?  Never ask me stuff when a sensitive answer is needed.  My heart is ice and kept in such a state by the liquid nitrogen in my veins ;-)
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